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Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Dialogue with a Non-Trad

and on this installment of The Diaries of a Traditional College Kidd, who hates Old College Kidds, the actual words that took place between me and and old lady who came into the bookstore to purchase a USB Jump Drive. She had on a backpack...old ladies shouldnt have backpacks.

Regular College Kidd(Me): Hi ma'm can I help you with anything?
Old Lady College Kidd: Yes Im looking for a USB Port Jump Drive (confused face)
Regular College Kidd(Me): (annoyed face) Okay they are right here by the batteries, these our only two brands
Old Lady College Kidd: (In competele technological niaveness) Do all these jump drives fit all computers?
Regular College Kidd(Me): Yes ma'm they all go in the usb port
Old Lady College Kidd: O where is that
Regular College Kidd(Me): Well if you have a newer computer or a Dell it may go in the side of the monitor, if you have a laptop it will go in below the keyboard, and if you have an older computer it will go in the tower
Old Lady College Kidd: O, I have an older computer
Regular College Kidd(Me): Okay then it will most likely go in the tower
Old Lady College Kidd: What's the tower?
Regular College Kidd(Me): (ready to commit homicide with a jump drive) the computer part, its tall and fat, not the screen
Old Lady College Kidd: O okay, is it where my internet connects in the back?
Regular College Kidd(Me): No mam, that is the ethernet cord, it looks like a phone jack, see this (pointing to the obvious) is more rectangular, and there most likely isnt anything in the place where you put it yet, maybe a mouse, but I doubt it.
Old Lady College Kidd: O i see
Regular College Kidd(Me): Ya (fake smile)(praying that she doesnt want me to explain how to open the folder once she plugs jump drive into the computer)
Old Lady College Kidd:
Actually I don't want it. Ill just print my paper at home, thank you though....

This is the exact reason why Non-trads should have their own colleges with a quill and scroll, and stay away from us TRADITIONAL kiddes with an actual future.

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